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33 THINGS I’VE LEARNED IN 33 YEARS

Today I turn 33! I always like to reflect on the days leading up to my birthday on what I’ve accomplished, and what the year has taught me. The year 2020 has been full of surprises, to say the least, and the greatest teacher yet, but I am still grateful because I’ve learned so much about myself in these past months.

As I was reflecting on this year, a quote that I saw on Instagram resonated with me, and it goes like this:

“We are not going through life; we are growing through life.”

So today, I wanted to share some life lessons I’ve learned (or at least started to figure out) during my 33 years on Earth. Some are deeper than others, but they are all valuable.

1. God is in control. If you know me, you know that I am a control freak. I’m always “wrestling” with God, because I always want to know what’s the next step or what He’s got planned for me. But I’ve learned to surrender and let Him do what He does best! 

2. If you’re breathing, God is not done with you. God has so much more in store for us! This chapter you’re currently living is not the end of the book! Take courage and have faith!

3. If you can worry about it, you can pray about it. Worrying is pointless. Use that same energy to pray your way out of the situation!

“So, which one of you by worrying could add anything to your life?

Matthew 6:27 TPT

4. Life is short. Cherish every moment. Don’t put off what you can do today! 

5. Check in often with your parents and loved ones. 2020 has been eye opening. Again, life is short. Don’t take them for granted. 

6. Put your phone down and be present. Whether we are eating dinner together as a family or whether I’m putting my daughter to bed, I try to put my phone away (not always!). But let’s not let technology steal these family moments away from us.  

7. You are an example, whether you want to be or not. People are watching you and you are either a bad or a good example. Be intentional about the kind of legacy you want to leave behind.  

8. Laugh at yourself. It’s not that deep. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

9. Move your body. A 10 or 30 minute workout, a walk, taking the stairs, however you choose to move your body, these little habits will make a tremendous difference psychologically. 

10. Take care of your skin. Put on sunscreen. Do regular facials. Growing up, I’ve watched my mom always take care of her skin. She was always doing a tomato or lime base facial. And honestly, she has the best skin! Your skin is your best accessory! Take care of it.

11. Embrace your body, flaws and all.  Repeat after me: “I am FLAWESOME!”

I am FLAWESOME!”

12. You will make mistakes and that’s OK. You are only human. Being a perfectionist, I put a lot of pressure on myself. But then I’ve learned that if I do the best that I can, that’s enough!

13. Give yourself grace. Just as you extend grace to others, extend grace to yourself. Sometimes, it’ll take for you to say out loud to yourself: “I forgive you. I forgive you for self-sabotaging, for doubting you, for not loving you.”

14. It’s OK to say “No”. Better to say no when you’re not sure, than committing to something just to please everyone. 

15. Not everyone will like you.  And that’s perfectly fine. We are more than 7.7 billions on this planet. It’s OK if a few don’t like you.

16. Pick your battles. Not every battle needs to be fought. You don’t have to show up for every argument you’re invited to.  

17. Surround yourself with people who will lift you up. You are directly influenced by the people you spend the most time with. Spend time with people who inspire you to be better.

18. The quality of your thoughts determines the quality of your life. When thoughts of defeat come, do you sit comfortably and entertain them or do you replace them with the truth, the word of God?  

19. Don’t compare your beginning with someone’s ending. Comparison kills so many dreams. 

20. Be your greatest supporter. Believe in yourself! Celebrate your victories, even the smallest ones. 

21. No one has it all figured out. We are all trying to do our best. So, relax and breathe a little!  

22.  If you don’t know something, ask. Google it. Educate yourself. There are no excuses to stay ignorant.

23. Speak up for yourself. When you do so, you specify what’s acceptable to you and honor your own boundaries

24. Speak up for what is right.  Don’t be silent. What is in your hands? Your platform? Your Blog? Your music? You? Don’t let the opinion of others stop you from doing what is right.

“The time is always right to do what is right.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

25. It’s OK to change your mind.  We get new information by the second. I remember, back in January, when a few people were starting to wear masks, I was looking at them like “Seriously…” But now, let me catch someone with no mask on!!

26. Some people are in your life for seasons, others for a lifetime. You will outgrow some of your friends (or they will outgrow you). Learn to leave behind what needs to stay behind. 

27. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. Don’t ignore the signs. 

28. Asking for help is wisdom. Not a weakness. 

29. Save for rainy days and dreams. Build that Emergency fund, Vacation Fund, “Designer bag” Fund etc. Set up automatic transfers to different savings accounts and name them according to the intended purpose.

30. Don’t let #FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) rule your decision making. You don’t have to do what everyone else is doing.

31. You can be a good mom and still want some time off.  Motherhood is hard! Whoever says it’s not is not a mother.

32. Make time for yourself. And don’t feel guilty about it. Even superheroes have to rest sometimes.

33. Lastly, You are, simultaneously, a masterpiece and a work in progress. You are constantly evolving, learning, progressing. Embrace your journey!

So much more that I would love to share! But let’s stop with these for now. I hope that one of these life lessons has resonated with you. What’s something you’ve learned over the years?

Until next time,

xoxo

5 MINUTE ZOOM MEETING MAKEUP LOOK

During this quarantine, zoom meetings and impromptu video calls are more frequent than ever! This is my tried and true makeup routine, when I only have less than 10 minutes to spare before my meetings. It gives you a natural, put together look, but with the hint of glow we all want!✨

Music: Accra
Musician: Jef

Shop my look:

Products used:

Sidenote: I did my eyebrows, off camera, using the Benefit Cosmetics “Precisely- brow pencil”.

Until next time,

xoxo

ARE YOU MY FRIEND?

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Are you my friend? Then it’s time to speak up! Please don’t be silent. We cannot turn a blind eye just because it makes us uncomfortable. Let’s stop pretending that racism does not exist. Maybe you feel that is on the other side of the border, therefore it doesn’t affect you. Let me tell you something: I have been personally a victim of racism. I’ve been called the N word, been spat at while in my car, here in Montreal, in broad daylight!

Not calling for a pity party here, but rather for you to use your voice, your platform, your creativity, whatever you got, to speak up against racism and make a change. 

Remaining silent and turning away from what makes uncomfortable is not the way to see change. Let’s be the change we wish to see in the world.

I speak to white and non white people. We’ve stayed silent for too long! Now is the time to speak up. 🗣🗣🗣

As I read this famous quote of MLK, I pray for restoration, healing for our nation and that we have the courage to speak up against racism!

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.”

Proverbs‬ ‭31:8‬ ‭NIV‬‬

#blacklivesmatter

Alexa

VALENTINE’S DAY LOOKBOOK

“Love is like the wind. You can’t see it, but you can feel it.”

A Walk to Remember

Valentine’s day is right around the corner! 🌹 ♥️ 🌹. Whether you’re celebrating with your significant other, your friends or by yourself (#whynot!), you should do so in the cutest outfit! In the below video, I styled 3 outfits that work great for whatever mood you’re feeling like on V-Day: Whether you want to be comfy, or you’re feeling sophisticated, there’s something for you.😉

Oh! And the best thing is these outfits not only work for V-day but you can wear them for other occasions!

Music: Moon Bay
Site: https://icons8.com/music/

I’ve linked each outfit with similar styles that range from affordable to investment-worthy pieces, so you can recreate these outfits!

Outfit #1

Outfit #2

Outfit #3

Let me know in the comments which look you prefer!

Until next time!

xoxo

J.O.M.O

Some of you may have noticed, others may have not, but for the last 3 weeks I have been m.i.a on Instagram. I decided to take this time off to refocus, get clarity and a clear vision from God for my future, my family etc. 🙏🏽

Honestly this move is against everything that all social media “experts” advise : “Make sure you post consistently!” “Make sure you at least have an online presence!” “ Don’t forget about the algorithm!” 🤯 

But I realized that with all the chatter of social media, it’s easy to get sucked in the routine and just go through the motions in life, without accomplishing anything concrete! It’s easy to just go, go, go and not take the time to just BE. We live our lives in a constant #FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) state, that even if our soul is exhausted, we just keep on pushing, and never take the time to properly rest, because we’re oh so afraid of missing our next opportunity.

They say it takes 21 days to form an habit… This time off has really helped me appreciate and live in the present moment. Of course there were times that I would mechanically open social media! 😬 but then I remember the bigger purpose (refocus, be attuned to God’s voice) and close it right away! 😬

Everyone is talking about #2020vision but in reality some of us are living life blind to our real purpose in life. I’m not saying everyone has to go on a social media fast, but please don’t let it be all talk, no action and by the time 2021 rolls up, nothing’s been accomplished!  

Until next time

xoxo